Do to Others What You Would Have Them Do to You!
September 7, 2025
Scripture: Matthew 7:12
A little girl heard the pastor say, “The Golden Rule is to do to others what you would have them do to you, for this sums up the Law and the prophets.” Later that day she got upset and prayed aloud, “Lord, do you really mean, do to others as they do to you?” Because if you did, then I’m really going to fix my brother.”
It is interesting that almost everyone in this country has heard of the Golden Rule. They may not know that it is from God’s word, but they have heard of doing to others as you would have them do to you. Yet it is hardly practiced. Others misinterpret, misunderstand, or have their own Golden Rule. Today, I want to take a serious look at this important principle that Jesus teaches! So, let’s look.
Matthew 7:12 begins with the word, So. It could also be translated, therefore. The word connects to what Jesus taught in the previous verses. At the end of chapter 6, Jesus instructed to seek ye first the kingdom of God! It is to love the Lord with all your being.
Then, in the first part of Matthew 7, Jesus teaches not to be critical. One needs to realize his/her own sinfulness, weaknesses, selfish desires and remove the log or logs from one’s life. We are to take the plank(s) out of our own eye before taking the speck out of someone else’s.
Then Jesus noted that we are to ask, seek, knock and you shall receive earnestly pray. Our Heavenly Father’s has a loving and generous nature. This does not mean He gives us whatever we want. He has shown His love by giving us His Son, Jesus, who died a horrible death to be the sacrificial lamb for our sin. As one wholeheartedly believes in Jesus, He forgives and opens the door for us to have eternal life! Also, as noted, two weeks ago, He particularly gives us His Spirit, His power, His presence to handle life here on earth. As we ask, seek, knock, He will pour out His love, His power and presence on the inside to heal and to handle the things in this physical world.
So/therefore then indicates this point. Since our Heavenly Father is loving, then we are to be loving toward others just as our Father loves us. His love will prompt us to love the Lord with all our being and to love others! Our response to God's grace should be to extend it to others; we love because he first loved us, therefore, let us love others as we are loved.
Another way to put it as Jesus said in In Mark 12:30-31, Jesus said, You must love the Lord your God with all your heart, all your soul, all your mind, and all your strength. The second is equally important: Love your neighbor as yourself. No other commandment is greater than these.
Without doing the first part, you really don’t have the ability to even try the second part. When you strive to love the Lord your God with all your heart, soul, mind, and strength, you gain the help of the Holy Spirit which helps you to love other people.
Listen, unless we have the presence and power of God’s Holy Spirit in each of our lives, walking in the Spirit, we are going to be self-centered and desire to fill our selfish desires.
Titus 3:1, 2 states, Remind the people to be subject to rulers and authorities, to be obedient, to be ready to do whatever is good, to slander no one, to be peaceable and considerate, and always to be gentle toward everyone.
Then the Apostle Paul tells us why and how we can do this in verses 3-7. At one time we too were foolish, disobedient, deceived and enslaved by all kinds of passions and pleasures. We lived in malice and envy, being hated and hating one another. But when the kindness and love of God our Savior appeared, he saved us, not because of righteous things we had done, but because of his mercy. He saved us through the washing of rebirth and renewal by the Holy Spirit, whom he poured out on us generously through Jesus Christ our Savior, so that, having been justified by his grace, we might become heirs having the hope of eternal life.
Galatians 5:13-26, You, my brothers and sisters, were called to be free. But do not use your freedom to indulge the flesh; rather, serve one another humbly in love. 14 For the entire law is fulfilled in keeping this one command: “Love your neighbor as yourself.” 15 If you bite and devour each other, watch out or you will be destroyed by each other.
16 So I say, walk by the Spirit, and you will not gratify the desires of the flesh. 17 For the flesh desires what is contrary to the Spirit, and the Spirit what is contrary to the flesh. They are in conflict with each other, so that you are not to do whatever you want. 18 But if you are led by the Spirit, you are not under the law.
19 The acts of the flesh are obvious: sexual immorality, impurity, and debauchery; 20 idolatry and witchcraft; hatred, discord, jealousy, fits of rage, selfish ambition, dissensions, factions 21 and envy; drunkenness, orgies, and the like. I warn you, as I did before, that those who live like this will not inherit the kingdom of God.
22 But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, forbearance, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, 23 gentleness and self-control. Against such things there is no law. 24 Those who belong to Christ Jesus have crucified the flesh with its passions and desires. 25 Since we live by the Spirit, let us keep in step with the Spirit. 26 Let us not become conceited, provoking and envying each other.
When we walk in the Holy Spirit, we are able to heal and shed the hurts of life, to overcome bitterness and fear, to grow and move forward. As we let the current of God’s Holy Spirit pass through us, we can demonstrate the love and light of Jesus!
Principle 1: If you are going to do to others what you would have them do to you, then you need to love the Lord and walk in His Spirit!!! Unless you are rightly related to God, it is impossible to fulfill the Golden Rule. It fulfills who you are in Christ!
The phrase, in everything, simply indicates that the principle of the Golden Rule must guide our day-to-day treatment of others.
Then Jesus states what is known as the Golden Rule, Do to others what you would have them do to you.
In other words, treat all like you want to be treated, and more than that, treat all as God has treated you. Now, many think that the Golden Rule is merely based on how we want to be treated. However, if you really understand the principle, it is to imitate God, to love like Jesus. It is to treat others as God has treated you and would treat them.
I think Jesus really clarified and took it up a notch as he stated in John 13:34, 35, A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, you must love one another. 35 By this everyone will know that you are my disciples if you love one another.
Now, to show true love, we need to put on the perspective of Jesus! As I have mentioned in the past, when I struggled with anger and bitterness, I had to take to heart how much God has forgiven me, a billion dollars. So, if he has forgiven me big time, how can I let bitterness/an unforgiving attitude towards someone who in a sense owes me twenty bucks. (Note: The Parable of the Unmerciful Servant in Matthew 18:21-35.)
We need to love like Jesus loved us! Paul put it this way in Ephesians 5:1, 2, Therefore, be imitators of God as dearly loved children and live in love, just as Christ also loved us and gave himself for us, a sacrificial and fragrant offering to God.
Ephesians 4:32 states, Instead, be kind to one another, compassionate, forgiving one another, just as God in Christ also forgave you.
Paul encouraged us to have the same mindset as Jesus. He writes in Philippians 2:2-5 Make my joy complete by being like-minded, having the same love, being one in spirit and of one mind. 3 Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves, 4 not looking to your own interests but each of you to the interests of the others. 5 In your relationships with one another, have the same mindset as Christ Jesus:
We are to love like God. We must forgive others like God forgives us. We must serve others like God serves us. We are to have the same mindset as Jesus!
Now, sometimes, one needs discernment to apply Christ-like love. One needs to ask, “What would Jesus do? How can I best love this person?” Do I need to show tender love or tough love? Should I be gracious, and help them with a ride or some financial assistance? Should I show kindness with the hope they will repent (Romans 2:4) or feel the love of Jesus? (Romans 2:4). Do I need to forgive and attempt to rebuild the trust gauge?
Or do I need to show some tough love by correcting, rebuking, and teaching God’s word and perspective! I am afraid many think they are showing love to others but only enabling that person to continue in their selfish, sinful ways. The most loving thing one could do is show some tough love. There are times our Heavenly Father does this.
So, please realize that the Golden Rule does not mean that you become a doormat. It does not mean that you lose yourself in the desires of other people. Your own desires should align with what God desires. It is doing His will, not self-will. It shows His love!
Now let me note this. In any relationship, mutual respect creates a healthy relationship. If each person has clear and acceptable expectations, then a relationship can grow. I know you have certain expectations of me as a pastor, and I have certain expectations of you. Now, if those expectations are met, then all is well. If not, then an open dialogue needs to happen which fosters greater understanding and reduces conflicts. If we treat each other with respect, we can build a strong partnership.
This is especially true within a marital relationship. Ephesians 5 notes the husband is to love his wife like Christ loves the church and the wife is to respect her husband. When either spouse loses love and respect, the relationship is going to be rocky and most likely end in divorce. However, as each spouse practices the Golden Rule, the relationship will flourish with love and intimacy. The key, and I speak from having a wonderful marriage, is to put Jesus first, apply His principles and continue to grow and mature in Him. Both spouses need to do this! It cannot be one sided!
Principle 2: Treat others the way you would want to be treated/how Jesus would treat others! Learn and grow in Christ to show true love!
Let me share this parable written by a person learning from a cat what it means to love as we want to be loved. Everyone in the apartment complex I lived in knew who Ugly was. Ugly was the resident tomcat. Ugly loved three things in this world: fighting, eating garbage, and shall we say, love. The combination of these things combined with a life spent outside had their effect on Ugly. To start with, he had only one eye. He was also missing his ear. His left foot appeared to have been badly broken at one time and had healed at an unnatural angle. His tail was only a small stub. Ugly has sores covering his head, neck and even his shoulders with thick, yellowing scabs. Every time someone saw Ugly there was the same reaction. “That’s one UGLY cat!!”
All the children were warned not to touch him. The adults would throw rocks at him or hose him down. If you threw things at him, he would curl his lanky body around feet in forgiveness. If you turned the hose on him, he would stand there, getting soaked until you gave up and quit. Whenever he saw children, he would come running, meowing frantically and bump his head against their hands, begging for their love.
If you pick him up, he will tug on your shirt and purr.
One day Ugly shared his love with the neighbor’s huskies. They did not respond kindly, and Ugly was badly mauled. From my apartment I could hear his screams, and I tried to rush to his aid. By the time I got to where he was laying, it was apparent Ugly’s sad life was almost at an end. As I picked him up and tried to carry him home, I could hear him wheezing and gasping and could feel him struggling. Then I felt a familiar tugging on my shirt and the sound of purring. I pulled him closer to me. Ugly, in so much pain, suffering and obviously dying, was asking only for a little affection and compassion.
At that moment I thought Ugly was the most beautiful, loving creature I had ever seen. Never once did he try to bite or scratch me, or even try to get away from me, or struggle in any way. Ugly just looked up at me completely, trusting in me to relieve his pain.
Ugly died in my arms before I could get inside, but I sat and held him for a long time afterward, thinking about how one scarred, deformed little stray could so alter my opinion about what it means to have true pureness of spirit, to love so totally and truly. Ugly taught me more about giving and compassion than a thousand books, lectures, or talk show specials ever could. He had been scarred on the outside. But I was scarred on the inside. And it was time for me to move on and learn to love truly and deeply. Ugly did what he would want done to himself. And his actions changed the heart of a person who needed to show greater love.
Jesus knows we can change the world. Do to others what you would have them do to you.
You want to be forgiven? Forgive!
You need affirmation? Affirm!
You feel hurt, wounded, broken and could stand a gentle touch? Be gentle with others!
You appreciate tact? Be tactful! Speak the truth in love.
You enjoy a nice compliment? Compliment others!
If you understand and apply the Golden Rule, your life will be transformed!
Jesus concludes verse 12 by stating, for this sums up the Law and the Prophets.
The Law and the Prophets was an expression that meant the whole Old Testament. Jesus is telling us that the person who consistently lives according to the Golden Rule is fulfilling God’s will. Jesus calls this command to do for others as you would have is the heart of God. The cross amplifies this message in our hearts. Through the cross, he draws us to Him. Our heavenly Father is a loving, caring, powerful being who gives good gifts to His children.
Principle 3: Do God’s will! Have the heart of God by applying the Golden Rule!!!
If you do God’s will and apply the Golden Rule, you will experience the love, the joy, the fullness of God’s Spirit. Let me share about a fascinating study on the principle of the Golden Rule. A study was conducted by Bernard Rimland, director of the Institute for Child Behavior Research. Rimland found that “The happiest people are those who help others.” Each person involved in the study was asked to list ten people he knew best and to label them as happy or not happy. Then they were to go through the list again and label each one as selfish or unselfish, using the following definition of selfishness: a stable tendency to devote time and resources to one’s own interests and welfare—an unwillingness to inconvenience oneself for others.” In categorizing the results, Rimland found that all of the people labeled happy were also labeled unselfish. He wrote that those “whose activities are devoted to bringing themselves happiness are far less likely to be happy than those whose efforts are devoted to making others happy” Rimland concluded: “Do unto others as you would have them do unto you.” (Martin & Diedre Bobgan, How To Counsel From Scripture, Moody Press, 1985, p. 123).
Let me close with this. Twenty-five years ago, there was a movie called Pay It Forward. In the movie, a boy has a social studies assignment to find a way to change the world. His idea - Do something good for someone that they can’t do for themselves, then that person is encouraged to pay it forward. Show grace and kindness to someone else. People engage in acts of kindness to others only to say, “Don’t pay me back – I’m looking for nothing in return – pay it forward. Find three other people and do something for them.” Now the results were sometimes a failure or unsuccessful as the movie notes, but other times lives were transformed, numerous people were impacted.
Essentially, the heart of “Pay It Forward” is the Golden Rule. If the professing believers took this seriously and did it, it would change the world! How about you?
